A Lifetime of Journeys Through Books

From the moment I learned to read, books have been my steadfast companions. What began with simple cartoon strips in newspapers and colorful storybooks soon blossomed into a lifelong passion for literature—spanning grand novels and insightful non-fiction. Reading has never been just a pastime for me; it has been an immersive journey, allowing my mind to create entire worlds of its own. Through the pages of books, I have traveled to unknown lands, encountered countless characters, and lived a thousand lives—all without ever leaving my room.  

Books, to me, are more than just ink and paper; they are like people. Some have broken my heart, while others have tested my patience. Some have moved me to tears, made me laugh uncontrollably, or sent shivers down my spine. And yes, a few have even betrayed my trust, leaving me questioning everything I thought I knew.  

But why do I read? Many assume that reading is merely a form of entertainment or a hobby to pass the time. For me, however, books are lived experiences—stories that allow me to understand emotions, cultures, and perspectives I may never encounter in my own life. They offer a glimpse into diverse worlds, introducing me to people of different ethnicities, languages, and lifestyles.  

For instance, I may never cross paths with someone who struggles with social anxiety. Yet, through books, I have come to understand their world. While they might experience emotions as deeply as anyone else, their heightened sensitivity to their surroundings can make it difficult for them to express their thoughts. Books have taught me to perceive the unspoken—to recognize emotions that words often fail to convey.  

Fantasy novels have expanded my imagination, showing me that words have the power to create entire universes. On the other hand, literature grounded in reality has shaped my perspective, making me more empathetic and less judgmental.  

Through historical fiction, I have walked through centuries of human civilization, witnessing the hopes and fears of those who lived before me. Through memoirs, I have stepped into the shoes of people whose realities are vastly different from mine, yet whose emotions feel strikingly familiar.

I still find immense joy in reading children's novels, and they never fail to remind me of life's simple yet profound pleasures—love, kindness, innocence, and the beauty of sharing. These stories, though often crafted for young minds, hold timeless wisdom that resonates across all ages. They transport me back to a world where friendships are pure, dreams are limitless, and even the smallest gestures carry great meaning. In a fast-paced world filled with complexities, children's books serve as a gentle reminder that sometimes, the simplest values are the most important ones.

Books have not just been a source of knowledge or escape; they have shaped the way I see the world. They have taught me patience, broadened my understanding, and made me a better observer of life itself. With every book I read, I add another layer to my perception, another story to my soul.

Faith Through My Lens

My belief in God has changed and continues to evolve over the years, shaped by my experiences, the people I meet, the books I read, and the things I see. As a child, my prayers were simple and transactional—I prayed for good marks or to get out of a difficult situation. I believed that if I prayed sincerely, things would change. But over time, I realized that my prayers had no direct effect on the outcomes I wished for. This led me to conclude that last-minute prayers do not create miracles.

As I grew older, my prayers became simpler. Whenever I was in a temple or during a pooja at home, I found myself saying just one sentence: 'May all be well.' After that, my mind would go blank. I do not believe in rituals or specific forms of prayer, nor do I adhere to any religion in a strict sense. Yet, I continue to follow the practices of my family—not out of faith, but out of habit.

I am often conflicted by many religious practices. I do not fast, nor do I engage in transactional prayers. I do not believe that God expects anything in return for devotion. More importantly, I do not fully understand what God is. Why do we need to please God? If God is all-powerful, why does good and bad exist? If God is testing us, does that mean He lacks control over what we do? The idea of a God who punishes and rewards like a teacher grading an exam seems at odds with the concept of a supreme, all-knowing being.

Instead of a deity with human-like emotions, I believe in a supreme force or a law of nature that governs involuntary cycles of life. I have never experienced divine intervention that punished my wrongdoings or rewarded my good deeds. But I do see a larger rhythm to life, an order beyond human understanding. Perhaps that is what I perceive as God—a force that moves, not with expectation or judgment, but simply as it is.

Growing up with Tamil traditions, I have often observed practices like 'venduthal' and 'nerthi kadan,' where people make vows to God and fulfill them upon their wishes being granted. I have never understood the idea of negotiating with the divine. If God is all-knowing, why would He require offerings or fulfilled vows? I wonder if these practices arise more from human emotions of gratitude and fear rather than any divine expectation. They seem to be a way for people to seek control over uncertainty, a reassurance that their faith is being acknowledged.

Similarly, Tamil customs include elaborate temple visits, processions, and rituals that are deeply woven into cultural identity. While I participate in them, I do so as an observer rather than a true believer. I appreciate the sense of community and continuity these traditions bring, yet I remain uncertain about their spiritual significance. If faith is meant to be personal, why does it often feel like an obligation to follow inherited customs? Perhaps faith is less about structured belief and more about finding peace in whatever form resonates with us individually.

So, I no longer seek miracles in grand gestures; I see the divine in the simplest things. In doing so, I realize that my journey of understanding God is ongoing—fluid, changing, and deeply personal.

Why is there a WAR?

I finally watched Schindler's list last week. It was on my list of to-watch for quite sometime. Like many of us in the recent times, my patience for watching a 3-hour long movie has gone for a toss. So I had put it on hold for sometime now.

To those who have no idea on the movie, it is set in the Nazi-occupied Poland during WWII where the Jews are looted off their home and valuables and quarantined as herds and how a German tries to rescue them.

Half an hour into the movie I was overwhelmed with the feeling of ineptitude and rage. This is not entirely new to me. Yes, I have been introduced to gruesome realities of the WWII. But it always creates this vortex of thoughts that cannot be put into words. 

There are many other fictional books that I have read set in the WWII world. Everytime I start reading such books or watch movies, I dread the events that are to follow. I can hardly say I understood what the Jews went through. I am trying to put myself in that period, in their shoes. They do not have a house, don't know if they will live another day or will see their family again. It has been 80 years since the war has happened but the effect that it creates on the generations that are present now and yet to come is never-ending. It gives a mental trauma just by hearing or reading some of the narrations. 

In 2014, I read the 'The Boy in Striped Pyjamas' and the climax is deeply etched into my mind. The entire book is from a little boy's perspective who befriends a Jew boy in the concentration camp separated by a wire fence from his new house. I literally shuddered at the climax. 

I have witnessed two major wars between 2 countries - the U.S. war on Afghanistan post 09/11 and the most recent Ukraine war. Lives lost, properties damaged and destroyed. I do not understand why wars should happen. I cannot fathom a sane reason to destroy the livelihoods of fellow humans. 

Ultimately I can only think of two reasons that cannot be justified at any point. Either it is greed or fear. Greed for resources and power or Fear of losing  War has been a form of survival of the fittest from the period of cavemen. To find the alpha of the group and then find places for establishing their civilization. Gradually when the human beings became civilized creatures, one would expect the war would go extinct. But the warfare has become more sophisticated and technologically advanced and without doubt, more dangerous than ever before.

There is no answer as to why war is necessary or even if it is necessary. Everyone might put forth the point that we must be ready for war to keep the peace. Yes, I agree. But will there be an end to 'he started, I reverted' argument. Time only can answer.

Potterhead Reminisces - Part 2

So continuing on the HP journey...

First ever theatre experience:

The first ever theatre experience was a bit baffling. The movie was the Half Blood Prince. When the movie released I was in Gandhinagar for my job training period. A couple of my friends and I had finished the training by 6.00 pm and rushed to the theatre for the 6:30pm show. Surprisingly there was no rush and we were the only people in the theatre. Apparently, it was a weekday. Only when the movie started I realized that it was the Hindi version. Oh! you should have seen me cringe for every spell that was translated to Hindi. 

But I was more pissed off by the entire movie than the language. For all non HP people, this book actually gives us glimpses of Voldemort's life i.e. the villain before he started scaring his world. Disappointingly the movie only had very essential portions the directors thought that would support the narration of the movie. I strongly object. Had they been included, maybe Voldemort would have more screen presence. The protagonist and antagonist would have been balanced. The flashbacks in the movie were only means to the end. I found the movie didn't do justice to the book.

Characters I like:

Harry, Ron and Hermione - Being the prime characters, I don't think these 3 need an explanation as to why I like them. Fun fact: Every time I read the book I pronounced Hermione as 'her-me-yon' but actually it was pronounced 'Her-my-oh-nee'.

Dobby - not pleasant to the eyes but a very sweet character. U might find him first revolting and annoying but you start liking him as time goes. My friends used to tease me that Dobby is my boyfriend. His loyalty can be heartwarming and always stands by what is correct. He is such a free-spirited creature.

Luna Lovegood- She is so peculiar and also sweet. Misjudged person at the first and people warm up to her later. 

Weasley Twins - The funniest, intelligent and mischievous duo. What's not to like in them. They are like the tiny rays of light when the story is travelling in the dark tunnel. 

Snape - This character was thoroughly a surprise. He can be the most annoying and infuriating person at times. Hated in all the 6 books and then one book changed everything. I even mourned when the actor who played Snape, Alan Rickman passed away. 

Characters I don't like:

Umbridge - She is the epitome of hypocrisy and cruelty. Of course we are supposed to hate her. Her character was written as such. I don't hate Voldemort as much as I hate her. 

Ginny, Trelawney - I don't know why I don't like these two characters. I never got to like them till the end.

Book set:

In 2016, I had an entire set of Harry Potter books. A gift from my husband. You should have seen me smiling from ear to ear. The fulfilment we feel when we get what we wished for, however small it might be can be soul satisfying. Don't get me wrong.. the book set is not a small gift.

Why people like Harry Potter:

I have a theory on why people like Harry Potter. It is a common good vs evil story with generous portions of fantasy elements in it. But this is not just a children's book. Children are always kept away from things that are scary like hatred, death, cruelty, loss etc. But these things are most of the time are part and parcel of our life. This book series touches the subjects about making choices in life while adulting and facing harsh realities of life. I am in my mid-30s now. My ideas and leanings towards different subjects have changed through time. But I can still resonate with many things in the book. I am not able to ignore the book as just a children's book. 

My husband's take on HP

My husband thinks Voldemort is the best wizard and Harry won because he is just lucky. Hubby admires him for his attitude, power and style and the story was biased too much towards Harry. Also being a fantasy novel,  no logic required for the final results. I contradict that though it is fantasy you cant leave gaping plot holes. Everything can be explained. I accept that Harry had help from friends, teachers and well wishers. The victory was not his alone. He is not as equally powerful as Voldemort. Nor was Neville. He could have taken the evil path of revenge for his parent's death and become more powerful and evil than Voldemort. Essentially Harry and Voldemort are similar by many ways. But it was Harry's conscious choices that speaks loads. Like in spiderman, with great power comes great responsibilities and Voldemort was reckless with his power.

I think I have maundered on enough on Harry Potter.

Until we meet again, Ciao!!! 

Potterhead Reminisces - Part 1

2022 started off with Harry Potter's 20th Anniversary Video in Amazon Prime. All who barely even know me, will know I am a Potterhead through and through. Damn, I was a Potterhead even before I read the books or watched the movies. It took me back to the time I was introduced to Harry Potter.

How it all started:

I was made aware of such a fantasy world when I was in my higher secondary. I was glued to the TV screen when glimpses of the first movie premiere was announced. 

The visuals were enticing for I have not seen any children's movie with CG like that. The previous movie which I think came close to my admiration was Jurassic Park. 

So I wanted get introduced to this world before watching the movie. I couldn't easily get my hands on the copy of the book. Buying a new one was an expensive affair. There was this classmate in school who had read the books. She started telling me the story during one of the free hours. Just as she started 'There was a boy called Harry Potter and when he was a baby he was attacked by a bad man called Voldemort' the bell rang. After this I couldn't get hold of her and that was the end for the narration of the remaining story.

I am not sure if it was HBO or any other TV channel. There was no subtitles when it was telecasted. So I had to watch with what little English I was able to follow in the movies. The enunciation was not as good as the cartoon network which was the only English channel I used to watch. Till the end of my school, I did not get any chance to read the books. 

My first ever Harry Potter book:

In my first year of my college when I found a battered copy of the first book in a second hand book shop, I didn't think twice. I was a very proud owner of my first HP book. I dived into this new world of imaginary creatures, things, spells, witches, wizards and whatnot. I lent the book to one of my friends and that was the last I saw of that book.

My Harry Potter Journey:

My reading order was chaotic. Of the first 6 books, I went from 1 to 3 to 6 and then came back to 2, 4 and 5. Many things were puzzling because of this disorderliness. But nothing stopped me from ploughing through the books. After watching the movies in television, I realized that the movies were really good. But the books were MINDBLOWING. The detailing were impressed me. You are introduced to new concepts of this wizarding world  in every book. But my favorite among all the books are Half Blood Prince and the Deathly Hallows.

When the Deathly Hallows released I was in my college final year and me with some of my classmates were anxious about the climax of the series. The ultimate question was - will Harry Potter live in the end? Funnily the pirated version of the book was doing its rounds - one the original and another a fake. In one Harry Potter dies and in another he lives. We didn't know which is which. Like the fools we were, mourning for his death. 

By then I had read all the books using the mantra beg, borrow or steal (It means the pirated ebook version) and the Death Hallows was the only book left. I completed all the books by the time I started working.

So how did I like the movies?

My first theatre experience, favorite characters and buying the book-set, more on my next post....

Summer Frolics

Me and summer season don't see eye to eye. Being in a southern part of subtropical country, sun is always included in your life package. Being an adult, we don't have summer holidays like the children. Now, the only redeeming feature of summer seems to be the food , or seasonal fruits to be precise. Decades earlier, there was a time when I was not taunted by the heat. I still remember my childhood days when I spent most of the days in my Aunt's house. When summer started after the annual exams, my cousin and I would sit down and plan what to do in the holidays. We did not go for any vacations. So we had to make do with whatever was available in and around the house.

First things first, old school books need to be packed away for old paper guy. We were cocky enough to think that we would pass our exams.

Saving money is something I have observed and admired from my cousin. He was very meticulous with money. Our ability to earn money was playing cards. We used to play cards every night with the aunt's family. 25 paise to Rs.1 for each game was the bet per head. So if either us wins we can get upto Rs.6 a day. The next day we would invest half the earnings in the game. We had our finance thinking caps on at that age.

The second best thing I admired about my cousin was how he kept his things neatly and he never lost a thing. All his old pens would be held in a box. We would soak all our fountain pens, wash them, dry them, categorize them and kept them ready for the next academic year.

Chithrai thiruvizha in our hometown is quite a famous festival.  We went out for Azhagar festival with the neighbors family and get squeezed in the crowds. But we were never bothered.

The exhibition in the tamukkam grounds was another highlight of summer. I am not a fan of the rides. I tried to get into the girls club and the kids club. My elder cousin was in college. She, her neighbour friends and I would spend time in all the artificial jewellery and accessories stalls. Trying out all the girly stuffs like different bindis, chains, earrings, clips, bands and on and on. In the kids quota, the younger cousin and I would go hunting games or playthings. Buying the bubble water was a feat for us. Then comes the food. Chilli bajji, big appalam, popcorn and cotton candy are the best.

That was a time when the only one ice cream brand I was aware was Arun Ice creams and it was not affordable or available nearby. We had to go in search of ice cream parlour to have one. The ice cream sold in cycles was our savior. I still remember the flavours. Rose milk, tutti fruiti, cola, mango, orange. All within Rs.5. 

One movie per summer in the theatres was allowed. We did not have multiplex or air conditioned halls. Neither did we have to buy expensive snacks at the counters. We were allowed to take snacks inside. So we would load our bags with all kind of snacks. Still we would get our cone ice creams at the theatres. It was challenge to finish the ice cream before it melts and the wafer falls off. It was kind of fun.

During the 1999 Cricket World Cup, we used to stock all snacks and beverages. Rasna was the famous household drink for summer. We used to mix many bottles of Rasna store them in the fridge. I still remember the Britannia campaign to win ticket to see world cup in person. I think, they gave out booklets for returning biscuit wrappers. Also there were Pepsi cricket cards in blue colour. 

Along with these we had Hindi tuitions for private exams. That was the only boring and low point of the day. We didn't have air conditioning at home during the period but it was the coolest times of all.

My Year in Books 2020: Not so satisfying!

When I started planning for the reading list 2021, I panicked and my choices of challenges were all over the place. Should I pick easy ones or the most challenging one or the convenient ones? So many questions. I also prepared Quirkysoul Reading Challenge 2021 which was tough considering I had read prompts from many reading challenges. 

Speaking of reading challenges, I took up 50 books as total target and by end of 2020 I was mid-way in my 46th book of the year. So 45 was my count for 2020. I did not have any cheat books to reach my target.

I am a bit disappointed with my reading. Out of 5 reading challenges I took up I was able to complete only one. Like I said in my previous post I bit more than I could chew this year. Below are the challenges I picked for 2020.

In the list below the green-coloured cells are completed prompts whereas orange depicts the one I could not complete.

A-Z Challenge:

A-Z Mini:

Popsugar Advanced Challenge:

Quirkysoul Reading Challenge:

There are few other books I read that do not fall in any challenge except Goodreads Reading Challenge.

Many prompts have some books repeated. Funnily I did not complete the prompts that I curated.

The top 3 books for me in 2020 are

1. Becoming by Michelle Obama: I felt this book did not pretend to be some noble person. It was simple, honest and inspiring.

2. Wings of Fire by APJ Abdul Kalam: Many technical terms of the book flew right over my head but  the book can give you positivity like the man, Kalam sir, himself. Oddly, when I was reading the book I could hear his voice narrate his journey. Another 

3. 3 books share the third place. The Thirteenth Tale - Diane Setterfield, The Silent Patient - Alex Michaelides, The Giver of Stars - Jojo Moyes: Each of them are different from each other but were certainly goodread.

Normal People by Sally Rooney was a bit disappointing for me as I expected too much due to the hype.

I am surprised that non-fiction(not a fan!) genre has topped by best book list. May be I should explore more in this category. I do have a tome for 2021 - The most suggested 'Sapiens' it is. Let us see how impressive it is going to be. Also last year I picked up some unknown authors and I did like many of those.

I have pledged to read 45 books this year and I am very cautious in creating my list of books. Also I am trying to clear the ever-growing TBR. Popsugar Advanced Challenge 2021 is going to help me do that.

More about these later.

C U Soon!